yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
