I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
