I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
