how can u be prego again
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
