she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize