Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
