I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
