Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
And then he peed in my hair
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