i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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