Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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