No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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