she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize