My nipple is on Facebook.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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