I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I woke up under a house in Key West
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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