i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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