Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
