Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
