i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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