Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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