I'm so fucking centered right now
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
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that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
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I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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