I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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