ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize