Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
