hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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