am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize