No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
