we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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