You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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