Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
