dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
