you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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