What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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