The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
this is an emotional support booty call
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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