A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
