he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Drunk is not a location!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
