One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
