This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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