trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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