So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
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