Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
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