Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
