I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.