the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
