Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
