return my video game
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
