while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
