you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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