My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
How does it feel to date your dad?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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