I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
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