Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
It's shark week go big or go home
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
